The Tightwad’s Table II: Patty’s Diner

Before you start reading, let me just say this: haul ass to Patty’s while you still can! They’re closing in early June, although the exact date is not set. But that still leaves enough time to have some good old-fashioned diner grub before last call!

Patty’s is so unimposing that it’s easy to miss, but once you’re inside, it will bring back memories of the old Woolworth’s lunch counter. In the center of the space is the “kitchen,” with the long Formica counter and swivel chairs on the left side and a few small tables on the right. Just take a seat (I recommend one at the counter, just to the side of the griddle) and wait about 2 seconds for service.

Patty does the cooking while her sister Susie is the waitress. It took me a long time to figure out what I wanted since I heard so many good things about the corned beef hash and old potatoes, which are not on the menu but should be front and center. Old potatoes are fries that are re-seasoned and refried with onions on the griddle. Think hash browns on steroids. I ended up getting the potatoes with 2 fried eggs and toast, tasty chow that cost me $6 with tax. Nothing on the menu is more than $7.95, including my neighbor’s chicken salad that came with a giant slice of watermelon, a cluster of grapes, buttered bread, and potato salad. You won’t find anything unusual on the menu, but everything is fresh and cooked to order. Try the
ham-off-the-bone, pancakes sprinkled with fresh blueberries (not that canned goo), giant biscuits with sausage gravy, and grilled cheeseburgers.

I’ll bet you didn’t realize that Patty’s also provides entertainment. Patty is the type of dame that doesn’t take any guff, and watching her bang out three meals in about 5 minutes without breaking a sweat was quite a show. The harmony between the two sisters as they shuffle around the narrow service area is like watching a dance. The food is delicious here, but the ambience is what my foodie pals and I will miss most. There aren’t a lot of hash houses around anymore, at least not many with this much charm.

After 20 years, the landlord decided to up the rent by an impossible amount, so Patty’s is closing down. Susie hints that she probably will relocate after a much needed rest. Selfishly, I hope that rest is short and the new diner opens up somewhere close—like across the street from my house.

Patty’s Diner

3358 Main St.

Skokie 60076

(847) 675-4274

7am-2pm Tuesday-Saturday, closes at 1pm Sunday

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